Who am I kidding? I’m just some ordinary girl man. You gotta buck up, JY.
I’m such a fickled person!
I just have to cock things up don’t I?
I try too hard to please and pander.
I love my family, hence I vow never to let out my anger on anyone of them, they don’t deserve it at all. This blog will be my anger outlet.
it just occurred to me that i always pander to everyone’s wants and needs without thinking about my own. i’m finding it too hard to please everyone now. from now on, i shall put my own priorities first. maybe i’ll be happier that way. i think i’ve been living in the illusion that i’m happy when other people are happy – it’s a false impression. it gets agonizing sometimes. this is what illusion does to you, it blinds your perception towards feelings. nothing is unconditional i realize – you’ll always want some form of reciprocation, deep down. no matter how much you want to delude yourself that it doesn’t matter, it does. and it agonizes.