i’m now stuck in this vicious cycle:
i procrastinate and only start working at 9pm and then i go to bed at 1am, wake up at 5am to continue working. four hours of sleep, that’s how much sleep i get on my good days. sometimes i get 3? 3.5? when i say ‘go to bed at 1am’, it means i only actually sleep at the very earliest 1:30am. then after that, i get tired, and so i take a nap in the evening, then i wake up, feeling not much more refreshed, lose my concentration, can’t work. then at 10pm, i’d go into panic mode, start working and even then, not get much done, then sleep with guilt at 1am. a nap in the evening would make me energetic enough to think about nonsense but not energetic enough to work, so i get an insomnia. i sleep at 2am, wake up at 5am in the morning. coffee doesn’t help much really, it makes me energetic yes, but i lose focus easily with a coffee-addled brain.
now i’m just outside the library typing this while i’m supposed to do work – i really need to get those healthy 8 hours during the weekends.
p.s. sorry for the incoherent writing